yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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