im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
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