i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize