you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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