Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

you still trying to smash that chick?

(1-248): View more from Michigan

it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober

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(248): you still trying to smash that chick? (1-248): it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober http://tfl.nu/22ty

Replies (1) Good night (623) Bad night (933)
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(571): View more from Virginia

shaved balls and baby powder=awesome

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(571): shaved balls and baby powder=awesome http://tfl.nu/ap4d

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(636): View more from Missouri

Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.

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(636): Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly. http://tfl.nu/3gr1

Replies (23) Good night (4980) Bad night (482)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep

(732): View more from New Jersey

sorry. that wasn't for you

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(732): Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep (732): sorry. that wasn't for you http://tfl.nu/2avz

Replies (31) Good night (1912) Bad night (5080)
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(413): View more from Massachusetts

My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace

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(413): My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace http://tfl.nu/tutd

Replies (10) Good night (1414) Bad night (4262) Order T-Shirt
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x

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(+44): Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x http://tfl.nu/rt6u

Replies (10) Good night (7780) Bad night (1045)
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(516): View more from New York

i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.

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(516): i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang. http://tfl.nu/ryqf

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(315): View more from New York

Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.

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(315): Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes. http://tfl.nu/lvfu

Replies (3) Good night (2055) Bad night (848)
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(306): View more from Saskatchewan

My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.

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(306): My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday. http://tfl.nu/tgen

Replies (2) Good night (1734) Bad night (1598) Order T-Shirt
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(502): View more from Kentucky

They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.

(808): View more from Hawaii

oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to

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(502): They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut. (808): oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to http://tfl.nu/7uxf

Replies (7) Good night (3055) Bad night (591)
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(352): View more from Florida

She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!

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(352): She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week! http://tfl.nu/rhq7

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(248): View more from Michigan

I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere

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(248): I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere http://tfl.nu/d1lq

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(250): View more from British Columbia

The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet

(1-250): View more from British Columbia

Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that

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(250): The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet (1-250): Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that http://tfl.nu/74qk

Replies (10) Good night (315) Bad night (760)
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(615): View more from Tennessee

Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.

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(615): Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will. http://tfl.nu/qydy

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(312): View more from Illinois

I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.

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(312): I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men. http://tfl.nu/h4bo

Replies (7) Good night (512) Bad night (155)

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