Texts From Last Night

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  (512): View more from Texas

  i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.

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  (512): i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT. http://tfl.nu/zq8a
  Replies (205) Good night (40544) Bad night (3417)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Who did Billy Mays play for?

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  (732): Who did Billy Mays play for? http://tfl.nu/wvwr
  Replies (33) Good night (719) Bad night (4214)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  So did the night end well for you?

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text

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  (847): So did the night end well for you? (248): I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text http://tfl.nu/n8vz
  Replies (31) Good night (1170) Bad night (9110)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin

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  (630): It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin http://tfl.nu/b3ck
  Replies (18) Good night (4223) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.

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  (630): the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever. http://tfl.nu/uuz9
  Replies (9) Good night (5949) Bad night (906)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment

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  (310): based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment http://tfl.nu/srdh
  Replies (31) Good night (1339) Bad night (11931)
• Favorite

  (540): View more from Virginia

  That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....

  (1-540): View more from Virginia

  It was the best sex i've ever had.

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  (540): That was the scariest sex i've ever heard.... (1-540): It was the best sex i've ever had. http://tfl.nu/k8p9
  Replies (13) Good night (7770) Bad night (1059)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough

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  (630): We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough http://tfl.nu/a8j7
  Replies (4) Good night (2806) Bad night (1231)
• Favorite

  (340): View more from US Virgin Islands

  $1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.

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  (340): $1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end. http://tfl.nu/eqa9
  Replies (4) Good night (3619) Bad night (717)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.

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  (605): and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno. http://tfl.nu/gxse
  Replies (10) Good night (5804) Bad night (889)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys

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  (512): We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys http://tfl.nu/ys3u
  Replies (2) Good night (713) Bad night (1101)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Did you fuck him in my garden last night?

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina

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  (847): Did you fuck him in my garden last night? (1-847): That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina http://tfl.nu/gy1z
  Replies (11) Good night (1026) Bad night (1558)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW

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  (417): THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW http://tfl.nu/z4i2
  Replies (1) Good night (1039) Bad night (309)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time

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  (616): I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time http://tfl.nu/iio9
  Replies (1) Good night (657) Bad night (252)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.

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  (949): Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows. http://tfl.nu/xhmr
  Replies (2) Good night (402) Bad night (346)

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