I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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