Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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