we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
The adults are the big ones right?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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