Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Randomize
