He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
