things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back