In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
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I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.