Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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