having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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