Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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