i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I party with great urgency now.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
