I looked at my own cervix.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
