Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
