I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
Randomize
