Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize
