The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize