i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
