things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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