did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
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