GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
