maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Randomize
