I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
This is my gift to your gina
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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