I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize
