she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
