I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Randomize