Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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