i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
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