what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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