scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.