I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT