brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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