I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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