You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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