i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
