You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
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