why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
there is glitter all over my balls
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
