There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
