Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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