What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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