Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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