I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
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