Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize