i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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