Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
