She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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