why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
