just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize