that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
